I've spent a lot of time thinking about the exchange with my brother on Saturday. I've also spent a lot of time thinking about this quote from the Buddha:
“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.”
and this quote by Mark Twain:
"Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it."
How can I stay angry at my brother? His actions and speech are caused by anger and hurt. They are not his true nature. How can I stay angry at myself? My response was caused by anger and hurt. It is not my true nature. With breath, I have washed the slate clean, recommitting to step forward with a peaceful, loving, compassionate heart. I inhale deeply the fragrance of the crushed violet as I drop the hot coal that has been burning my hand. Forgiveness is indeed a gift of the heart.