As is usually the case, to paraphrase Charles Dickens,
On the one hand, my daughter Mariel is graduating from college. This is such a time of hope and excitement -- her life lays before her, and it's looking full of promise. She was awarded a Fulbright Scholarship, and will spend all of next year in the Czech Republic, teaching English and being an ambassador for the United States. For her, it is the best of times, a season of light, and the spring of hope.It [is] the best of times, it [is] the worst of times ... it [is] the season of Light, it [is] the season of Darkness, it [is] the spring of hope, it [is] the winter of despair...
But then, as my heart is filled with joy, it is also filled with sadness. A dear, dear friend -- a person who has dedicated his life to charity and service -- is loosing his third bout with cancer, and now his time is running out.
How do I hold the joy and the sorrow, at the same time? How do I feel the exhilaration of a life picking up speed and taking off, while holding the grief of a life cut too short? Why must it be this way?
I turned to my journal, my place of refuge, where I can work out my feelings without judgment. First I covered a spread with lots of leftover book pages, and then started sketching with white paint. And who should emerge, but Lord Krishna. In the Baghavad Gita, Krishna, a reincarnation of Vishnu or God in a human form, reminds Arjuna (who, faced with a fratricidal war, turns to his charioteer Krishna for counsel on the battlefield) of his duty - his dharma - and shares the wisdom of yoga, the path to devotion, and the doctrine of selfless action. Krishna reminds Arjuna that everything -- the good and the bad -- is a manifestation of the divine:
He also reminds Arjuna to do his duty (which in this case is going into battle) with devotion, remembering that:I am the beginning, middle and ending of everything created. Of all knowledge, I am the knowledge of Atman [the Higher Self]. And in controversy, I am reason itself... I am time eternal... I sustain everyone as I dispense the fruits of all actions [karma]. I am also death who devours everyone and everything. Yet in the same moment, I am the source of all yet to be born... (Chapter Ten)
Whatever is born will undoubtedly die; whatever is dead certainly will be born... Beings are all unmanifested. At midstate they're manifested; and unmanifested again at the end ... The Self, which exists in everyone, the indweller, is invulnerable. Therefore, you do not have to grieve. (Chapter Two)These words inspired me, and gave me great comfort and permission to hold both the happy and the sad in my heart, remembering that they are both part of our sacred universe. In the end, my wish for my daughter and my friend is the same:
As the song goes, love is all there is.
I find painting faces quite a challenge - but thanks to all the amazing tutorials out there, and the most recent lesson on Lifebook, I am starting to get more comfortable. And the flowers and little orange bird on Lord Krishna's shoulder? Collaged from gelli prints and headed over to Carolyn Dube's gelli party.
Linking to the blog hops at Mandarin Orange Mondays, Inspire Me Mondays, Monday Mantras, Make it on Monday, Art Journal Journey (challenge yourself) and to the challenges at Simon Says Stamp (things with wings), Simon Says Stamp and Show (Inspired By).
Thank you for visiting! I read and treasure every comment and will answer any questions as quickly as I can.
You show deep pensive emotion in your face, during this best and worst of times! Your friends spirit is already shining though your love for him... that will never end!!Congratulations to your dear daughter! Very poignant post! Blessing to you!
ReplyDeleteHugs Giggles
You worked out tour feelings so well. You painted that face very beautiful I can feel the emotions!! Loads of best wishes to your daughter :)
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry to her about your dear firend yet I know how excited and happy you are for your daughter and what lies ahead for her. I have had so much loss in my life and the emptions never really leave but they crack me open a bit more each time. It is the bittersweet of living this life I guess. I am glad you have your beautiful art to give you solace. xox
ReplyDeleteThis is such a heartfelt post with such extremes in emotion you have reconciled thanks to your art. May the joy of her graduating help you bear the weight of the pain of your friend.
ReplyDeleteI love that post. Life is so full of ups and downs, we have to all find our own way to make it through.
ReplyDeleteSo much going on here, Jessica. I feel all your emotions. Congrats to your beautiful daughter for achieving something so big at such a young age. And to see a friend suffer as he is, is so not fair. I hope your journal brought you some peace and balance. All we can do is keep out faith in times like this.
ReplyDeleteOh and p.s. your journal page is just beautiful. That face.. oh that face.
ReplyDeleteIncredible.
ReplyDeleteYour journal pages are such a wonderful product of the strong feelings you've had to face. So sorry to hear about your friend.xx
ReplyDeleteThese pages are quite spectacular and thank you for sharing it and your joys and sadness with us.
ReplyDeleteWhat gorgeous journal pages!
ReplyDeleteJoy and sorrow - what a challenge to balance these opposite feelings. My your way forward be filled with love.
such heartfelt words and pages Jessica. I've only briefly gone thru some workshops on the Baghavad Gita but am very interested in the Hindu teachings. You have found a soothing way to art thru your emotions at this time.
ReplyDeleteEine fantastische Journalseite. Besonders das Gesicht hat mir gefallen!
ReplyDeleteVielen Dank für Ihren freundlichen Kommentar. Mein Vater war in der Lage, um Ihren Kommentar für mich übersetzen, weil Jiddisch war seine erste Sprache. Er war sehr stolz auf sich!
DeleteJUST WONDERFUL Jessica .. she is amazing ...
ReplyDeletethank you so much for joining us over on Art Journal Journey !
xxx Susi
What a beautiful post. We spent a summer in Prague and really enjoyed it.
ReplyDeleteSending comforting thoughts to you and your dear friend,
Rinda
Very nice I think your face looks great! I like the background it looks like news paper :)
ReplyDeleteBeautiful journaling really like the flowers & birdie very much happy AJJ Dxx
ReplyDeleteSo lovely this Journal,this wonderful fresh colours make me feel happy.
ReplyDeleteI like your paintings very much.
Greatings Sabine
Love your journal!
ReplyDeleteHope you daughter enjoys the Czech Republic and has a chance to get out into parts east of Prague... I was there 7 or 8 years ago and loved it! There is also an AWESOME book museum way in the middle of nowhere (an hour train ride from Brno where I found out about it, in the middle of the country.) Several trains and no one speaking English made it a most adventurous day! Here is a link to the museum: http://www.nm.cz/Hlavni-strana/Visit-Us/Museum-of-Book-in-Zar-nad-Sazavou.html?xSET=lang&xLANG=2
Thanks Rhonda - I will definitely give her this information! She's excited but also a little nervous. She was in Prague last year for a semester, but a year abroad in a small town is another adventure!
DeleteI love Dickens....loved that book! These pages are EXCEPTIONAL! Oh the color! Oh the face! Oh the bird! Oh the tiny details that only you do! Thank you for sharing your inspiration with us this week here at Simon Says Stamp and Show!
ReplyDeleteYour faces are awesome, Jessica! Your inspiration here is just fantastic! Love the soulful Krishna and the tiny bird ob his shoulder...very different from the usual peacock feathered Krishna!
ReplyDeleteWishing your daughter all the very best and strength to you and your friend.
The Srimad Bhagavatham gives a lot of teachings of Krishna and Krishna's own story.
Fabulous journal page Jessica! Love your post. :)
ReplyDeleteWow, your page is beautiful. I love that your heart is poured not the page. Amazing!!! So sorry to hear about your friend Jessica. Life is so fragile. Time passes so quickly, my daughter will be graduating in three short years as well, I cannot imagine it. Sounds like yours has such a promising future ahead of her, how wonderful.
ReplyDeleteSending love Jessica. Cherish every moment--the good and the bad....your face turned out beautiful as did the rest of the spread :)
ReplyDeleteI saw you on MIM I always love seeing your work I am # , stop by I would
ReplyDeleteLove to have you visit.
This is so sweet.
DIANA L.
http://dianamlarson.blogspot.com
WOW stunning journalling page.
ReplyDeleteThank you for joining us at Simon Says Stamp challenge.
luv
Debby
I came over from MIM cause I saw your work and could not resist having a look, it is wonderful, so much talent and imagination going on here, Have pinned and will be often having a look and admire. xx
ReplyDeleteLove the vibrant colour and pattern - and the expressive nature of your work. I have two favourites.... your MoM contribution and the bird. Thanks again for being part of Mandarin Orange Monday:)
ReplyDeleteWOW,this painting face is amazing, i love the pattern and the colors so wonderful,love it to much.
ReplyDeleteGreetings Jeannette
What an emotional post and page. I just love the way you painted the face and I love the way you brought those opposite emotions together so that it fits for both, the good and the sad.
ReplyDeleteLovely art work! Oh, I just love your bird on the first photo! =)
ReplyDeleteThe close ups of your pages are beautiful just by themselves, the face is fantastic, I love it!
ReplyDeleteThis is beautiful work Jessica - it really is. It's hard to be happy sometimes when there's other thoughts weighing us down. I guess balance is the best we can hope for here.
ReplyDeleteThanks for linking up!
Sarah @ A Cat-Like Curiosity
Thanks for taking the time to check out my blog Jessica...yes, I linked up to Carolyn's Gelli Print party already...love her site, Ronda's and yours as well. I pop in often to see what wonderful creations all of you have come up with. Thanks again for the kind words....and all the inspiration! Love your face in this post!
ReplyDeleteThis is both an emotional post and canvas, Jessica. Women's emotions are all interconnected and, therefore, we can carry both happiness and sadness at the same time. But what is important is that you not feel guilty about being happy for your daughter while your friend is dying. Conversely, you needn't feel guilty about being sad for your friend while your daughter's adult life is beginning with such pride and joy. Your canvas has grounded both of those emotions together in one place and found a common place for both in your sentiment. Bravo, Jessica! Bravo!
ReplyDeleteStunning Artwork Jessica. I spotted this on MIM..Loz
ReplyDeletevery beautiful!!!
ReplyDeleteStunning work with a lot of emotions going on!
ReplyDeleteA visual delight .Enjoyable post . Thanks for sharing on Make it Monday .
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing this quote...it is so poignant and so pertinent to me right now......thank you and bless you...x
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing this very moving post and your brilliant artwork here.
ReplyDeleteSending Brightest of Blessings to you and yours...
oxo
I'm so moved by these pages, Jessica, and so sorry for your friend. Your work is incredibly beautiful.
ReplyDeleteLove the artwork in the face. Beautiful... first one I saw from the small banners in show and tell
ReplyDeleteWhat wonderful pages and expressions of self. Congratulations to your daughter and sorry about your friend. Cancer is a hard one.... Love your story and your conclusion. It is always okay to feel whatever we feel, life throws things at us and we deal with it. Very meaningful art pages.
ReplyDeleteAwesome work! Love it!
ReplyDeleteWow - I'm speechless - just gorgeous design - the sides are true works of art!!
ReplyDelete